The Cripple

Next Installment

2007-06-28T15:41:59Z

Hey All,

Should've tried to update a little more regularly so I wouldn't forget all the entertaining bits and pieces from my adventures but haven't had great internet access until now... And now that I finally have my own computer accessing the net I will be able to upload pictures from the last few weeks :D

So to try and continue on from my last update... Flew into Heathrow for a brief stopover on my way from Dubai to Hungary and was met at the airport by the delightful Pants, who took me to the nearby Hilton Shortstay Hotel for a couple of hours. I was starting to get a bit sick by this stage, and also quite sick of flying, and had managed to sleep on every single trip I had done so far, including bus trips to and from Abu Dhabi, so relaxing in a hotel was heaven. In true Trolley form I slept on the flight to Budapest and actually awoke feeling quite refreshed!! Unfortunately by that stage it was about 10pm local time.

Hungary was absolutely beautiful - gorgeous weather and perfect temperatures for me with a couple of electrical storms thrown in for extra excitement. The city is so old with Gothic architecture so lots of nice things to look at, but sadly the concept of customer service is still a little foreign to them... The place we stayed at, KM Saga (Beethoven Room) was kitch and adorable, owned and run by this hilarious eccentric old gay man. If you're ever headed to Budapest, I really do recommend it!! Apparently Budapest is quite well known for its baths, and we did try to get to one that alternates between mens' days and womens' days, but sadly we got to the door and found that the place was closed until September!! Was very sad as we were so looking forward to having a nice swim. Apart from that, going to the Franz Liszt Museum, and a little eating out, everything was quite low key but it was wonderful to finally be with Pants again and the main point of the trip really was to spend some good q.t. with her :)

Got back to London a week after my heart breaking departure from Sydney airport and we were lucky enough to be met at the airport by my old school mate Sarah, who had invited me to stay with her and her sister. We dropped Pants off at her place near the city, got about two streets away heading on our way back down south to Sarah's place... and the car died going through an intersection!! Fortunately Sarah's brother only lived a couple of blocks away and managed to rescue us but that was the end of us having a car :(

I'm now staying in Sarah's house in Thornton Heath, Croydon, which is about a 25 minute train ride south of London, but she and her parents have just sold the house so we're moving to Southwark (south bank of the Thames) area soon. Croydon's a pretty rough area, and even though I'm quite used to be fluorescent white, I have never been so self conscious of it in my life!! I have to be quite careful about walking round at night so I'm really looking forward to our next move!

Had my little brother here in London last week so was really cool hanging out with him and doing the whole touristy sightseeing thing. Got to see a great Dali exhibition at the Tate Modern, wandered around and looked at the usual stuff like Nelson's Column, The Tower of London, St Paul's Cathedral, Leicester Square, Brick Lane, Camden Markets etc etc and this weekend is Soho Pride - apparently it can be a bit of a shambles and really doesn't even come close to stacking up in comparison to the Sydney Mardi Gras but the other events that go on around it sound amazing!! There's a queer club here called Hard On which is a mixed SOP type clubby place and OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG the special performer there this Saturday night is BUCK ANGEL - wheeeeeeee :D

Other than that, really gotta put my head down and start looking for work. The pay offered in the jobs I've seen advertised is really quite depressing so will have to see what I can work out around that... It's looking like agency work will probably be the best way to go despite its irregular nature. At least that way I won't be risking doing that stupid thing I do and burning myself out too quickly by working too many hours.

I'm missing Sydney and everybody there immensely. Keep thinking about the beautiful pets I had to say goodbye to and how much I would give to have cuddles with them and my friends... Had nice chats on Monday with Steve, Alex, Lara, ML and Timmeh - made me sad but fark it was good to hear their voices!!

Big Brother's on TV here and it's effen scary to think that the people in the house could possibly be a representation of this country's population!! Check out this muppet:

Possibly the Dumbest Man In England

It's torture watching it, but just like BB in Oz, you just seem to be completely encaptured by a self-harming fascination.

Hokay kids, really do have to do some serious stuffs now, but photos soon, I promise!!

Xx

Wow

2007-06-04T07:08:11Z

Fucking. Massive. Weekend

Feeling ever so slightly broken now, but at least I'm in better shape than Lara!

Thank you so much to the wonderful people who made it to my party and helped turn the night into so much fun :) and of course another huge thank you to the wonderful David and Marian for allowing me to host the party at their wonderful residence. Photos of the party and the amazing cutting I had done by Miss Y to follow of course!!

I have a voucher for Adrenalin Adventures that I was really really hoping to have a chance to use before I had to leave but now it's looking rather impossible!! It's worth $385, the website that tells you all the activities that are available is here, it's valid til Nov 17th... Anyone want to make an offer?

andre_janus @ 2007-06-01T18:54:00

2007-06-01T08:54:35Z

Heya Folks,

My flatmate Lara has been kindly organising the food for the bash tomorrow and asked if I could please ask a few more people to bring some snackettes tomorrow evening.

Nothing fancy, just trashy party food along the lines of party pies, sausage rolls, chips, dips etc - anything to soak up the vast quantities of alcohol ;)

I believe the fairy bread, chocolate crackles, pizzas and roast beef rolls are all under control!!

Please comment if you are up for the challenge

Thanks kiddliwinks

Xx

Reminder

2007-05-28T08:44:13Z

Bois n Boys n Grrls n Girls,

Just a little reminder that my leaving/birthday party will be held this Saturday:

From 8pm @ Uber - 28 O'Connor St, Chippendale. *Some* alcohol will be provided but mostly BYO.

Theme is Timewarp - anyone who turns up out of costume will be given something completely hideous to wear. If we run out of spare outfits by the time you get there, you will be dressed as either Adam or Eve (or Steve if that's your thing) in *only* vine leaves.

Let this be a warning.

Please RSVP asap if you intend on making the party so that I can have an idea of numbers. Otherwise the party is cancelled. I will have one on my own. You will all be jealous.

Trolley Xx

P.S. I'm still trying to give away an old-ish TV with a choice of it's own little TV cabinet or cute wooden coffee table to the first lucky person to put their hand up and come and collect it. I gave away a fridge last night, don't miss out!!

Movin on...

2007-05-19T04:08:32Z

If anyone is interested, or knows or anyone who may be interested:

* My flatmate is selling her car - it's a 1994 Honda Accord VTi, silver, automatic, 4 door sedan, has done approx 180,000kms, runs very well, has been regularly serviced, has coupla minor dents on it, yadda yadda yadda. Asking $6000 ono (reg til Dec '07), available from beginning of July

* I have a funky old school TV available to the first person to stick their hand up and collect it - it's a Philips 66cm 'Natural', no remote or anything, has AV input so games consoles/DVD players can be hooked up to it through a video player. Has nice colour and sound.

* Have listed a PS2 console package on ebay, can get the link when it's up if anyone is interested. Am also going to list my bed - a queen, slat base, *very* nice wood/metal frame... Unless someone nabs it before I manage to put it on ebay!! Pictures available.

Peace out. Yo

Word

2007-05-15T10:40:40Z

Hey All,

After 7 long years the time has come for me to uproot myself and move onwards... To the UK to be precise. So to commemorate the amazing people I've met and wonderful times I've had on this over-sized island (the West Island of NZ that is), I'm having a wee shin dig - also just in time for my birthday.

Where? Uber - O'Connell St, Chippendale (sorry, will have to get the street number but it's right near the corner of Abercrombie and only a block back from Broadway)

When? June 2nd... say from bout 8pm onwards?

Theme? Second time round for a couple of people, but I enjoyed it so much I'm going to have the theme as 'Time Warp' again. If your style is to dress up as a sweet transvestite from Transylvania - please feel free!! Otherwise, pick an era in time, excluding contemporary but may include the future, and dress up as *something* (preferably animate) from that period.

*Some* alcohol will be provided but generally B.Y.O

For those of you familiar with Uber, I'm sure you would be devastated to be be attending an event there where there are no play opportunities!! I would like to keep it fairly PG rated until a certain time, mostly for the sake of groups of friends who haven't really been exposed to this sort of 'lifestyle' before... So depending on the sequence of events during the evening, I am sure the dungeon will be available later in the night, but will def keep youse posted as to when.

Sadly my phone decided to shit itself again (wonderful effen timing) on the weekend so when you reply to let me know if you can make it or not, please include your cellphone number for my records? Will be screening all replies

If you are on my flist, you are invited. If you are not, just ask. Also, seeing as I am so short on contact numbers for various people at the moment, if there is anyone who you think I may not have contact details for, or who you think should be invited, please feel free to make suggestions

Ta very much, look forward to seeing you all on the night :D

Tee Hee

2007-05-08T00:20:28Z

Bloody New Zulunders!! :P

Soooo...

2007-04-29T15:57:22Z

Yup, been AGES since I updated!! Haven't really been up to that much other than the usual crap anyway - work blah blah blah

Just over a week ago I got the result of this stoopid effen court case that I had been going through for the last 4 1/2 years. Damn prick of a judge ruled against me, based on him deciding to believe these assholes who had taken the stand for the defence and LIED through their teeth!! Meh anyway, the main thing now is that it is over... Unless they decide to pursue me for costs, but that is an entirely different story!

So part of the reason I had been so impatient to get this case out of the way, apart from just wanting it to be over & having an enormous inconvenience out of my life, was so that I could embark on something very symbolic. For quite some time now I had been discussing with msservalan the possibility of her doing a permanent (hopefully!!) piece of art on my body in the form of a branding. I wanted to wait until the case was over and out of the way, so the branding, and more specifically the design, would represent multiple things about this time of my life.

The design I chose and drew is based on a traditional Maori design called a Koru, which mostly represents the beginnings of new life, but also has a few different meanings to different tribes or individuals e.g. for me, I wanted to have two of them branded on me so that one could represent the beginning of new life, but the other could also represent tracing back to my roots, or even just the journey that has led me here so far. Guess the whole Gemini/Twins thing also contributed to wanting the two of them.

Another factor is the fact that I'm leaving in just under 6 weeks, about to embark on an enormous adventure in the UK. So to have this piece, and more importantly a ritual incorporating cleansing, healing etc, done before I leave is extremely significant for me.

And while I think of it - EVERYBODY has to keep the evening/night of June 2nd free for my leaving party. It's only the weekend before I leave, which is possibly cutting it a little close, but I figure most of you I will see leading up to the party or my departure anyways, and it was the only weekend that really suited. So yeah, youse all gotta come or else!!

And lastly I would just like to say a MASSIVE thank you to msservalan for making it such an intensely spiritual, symbolic, healing, unforgettable and cleansing experience. I have never experienced anything in my life as powerful as this was, and may never again as I imagine a huge amount of the credit is owed directly to us, and of course Monkey who was my right hand man (and photographer - full credit!!), and the energies we all had present that night. My state of total and utter euphoria is quite apparent in a couple of those pics!! Now the impatience is all about getting the healing process started so I can see how it will turn out :D

Although from a month or two back...

2007-04-16T04:48:07Z

Monkey: "I NEED a facial"

Strangely he didn't find it as funny as I did :)

Funny :)

2007-04-09T14:27:51Z

My flatmate, on youtube

What Fun!!!

2007-04-07T04:10:08Z

1. Your age next birthday

2. Your favourite colour

3. Your middle name

4. The last meal you ate

5. Your bad habit

6. Your favourite fruit or vegetable

7. Your favourite animal

8. The town you live in

9. The name of your pet or your last pet

10. Your SO or best friend's nickname

11. Your crush's name

12. Your occupation

13. Your birth city

14. Your favourite song

For the Monkey... Cos he can't possibly suck at every single one of them :P

2007-04-03T02:23:45Z

Create your own Friend Test here

Yes, I am a sheep - I blame Monkey, he made me do it :P

2007-04-03T01:18:34Z

Create your own Friend Test here

**Edit**: yeah, sorry bout that everybody - I got one of the answers wrong... Bonus points if you can figure out which one it was :P

Stuff n stuff

2007-03-28T14:47:42Z

Do you like his tin foil hat? Bwahahahahahahahahahaha!!

*Snigger*

And for everybody!!!

But this one for some reason reminds me of liquidskin

So I keep meaning to do updates... And then I leave it too long... And then they no longer seem relevant or I forget what I was going to write n stuff...

One day I will write an update, hopefully before I leave the country (10 weeks and 1 day to go :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D)

Important points to note:

* The new job is going supa supa well - I have lots of targets to reach and my incentives are all BEER!!! And not just any old beer - it's the divine creations from Matilda Bay. So yeah, I'm thinking I should probably save it all up for when I start to have my string of leaving parties

* My Irish passport arrived last Friday so no more stressing about that - Woohoo!!

* I could hear the cat going mental outside my room earlier. I opened my door to find him in the hallway with a mouse... So I quickly shut my door again. Sadly the mouse managed to get into my room regardless and the cat, who has the attention span of a peg, is now lying in the hallway staring at me blankly while I scream at him to get in here and catch his friend. What makes it even worse, is that Steve is at work :( I really hope I get some sleep tonight so I'm not a *complete* vegetable at work tomorrow!!!

If I don't make it through the night, can someone please tell my Mum I love her? *sob*

andre_janus @ 2007-03-07T00:02:00

2007-03-06T13:02:15Z

cliogf - Happy Birthday Honey!! Hope you're havin a great day

Mwah!

Xx

andre_janus @ 2007-03-05T11:15:00

2007-03-05T00:15:33Z

Something that you really wouldn't expect to hear at the Mardi Gras Party:

"Are you looking for your Mum?"

Tee hee

M.I.A

2007-03-04T23:37:59Z

Between Mel and I, we managed to lose her cell phone with my sim card in it yesterday. Sad, cos there were quite a few cool party shots on it :( Fortunately we got a few good pics of the parade n stuff before the battery on her camera went flat - we really weren't having much luck with photography!! Alas my camera is also still M.I.A - does anyone know of any good psychics who can help me find it?

Will hopefully be getting the replacement sim this morning but if anyone sent me any messages, or left any voice messages, they are probably long gone by now so please don't be offended that I haven't got back to you!

The party was awesome. Today, however, isn't so great... We got home at 5pm yesterday, and I swear we would've stayed out even longer if Mel hadn't had to be on a plane back to Brisbane!! Suffice to say, I am feeling very sorry for myself and tender today. I also think that I have managed to catch this dreaded bug that everybody had last week. Wouldn't really have been fair if I didn't get it at some stage!!

Saw lots of lovely and beautiful people, had nice leg hugs from Timmie, started feeling like going home from bout 5am... Went to leave at 7 but caught swallowed by the outdoor dance area til closing time at 10am!!!

Feeling pretty scattered and this post seems to be a bit all over the place so maybe I should leave a proper update til my brain has unfried itself a little and I have pictures to go with it...

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

2007-03-01T08:11:48Z

OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG

I just booked my ticket to London!!!!!

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :D

In other news:
1) The roof is still dripping into my lounge room - not cool, and very messy
2) I must update my resume so I can kick ass in my interview in the morning and get me a nice cushy sales role

:)

Gah

2007-03-01T00:17:01Z

So Monday night, I'm sitting in the lounge talking to my Ma on the phone, and I remember clearly hearing a dripping noise but not thinking much of it as sometimes our kitchen tap leaks if you don't turn it off tight enough. Once I got off the phone however, I realised it was a different sound... And upon inspection found that the roof above the bookshelf was leaking... Right onto the stereo, books, cds etc Managed to sort that out with a couple of tubs on top of the book shelf and all was good again.

Then, yesterday morning I was standing in the kitchen drinking my coffee before hauling my ass off ~~to work~~ to the hair dresser before going to work, looking at where the leak had been, thinking "goodness, that looks mighty precarious". I wandered into the bathroom, was brushing my teeth, doing my hair etc... When I hear this crash and the cat comes bolting down the hallway!! I force myself to go and see what happened, and discover that rather large part of the coving has fallen in, and huge chunks of plaster have fallen on the floor, smashing all over the place.

No time to clean it up, so I leave it til I get home, call the real estate, unplug everything, empty and move the shelves... And then wait for the fun to begin. Lots of rain here last night so I was on constant mop and bucket changing duty. Some guy came this morning to have a look, fiddled with the drains, and now the downpour into our lounge is at its worst!!

Pissed off at missing the UnderBear party more than anything, can definitely sympathise with grey_evil_twin on that one *sigh* Pissed off at the amount of mess there is to clean up when my flatmates both seem to be MIA...

And cause I can't bear to miss out on anything, I have a job interview tomorrow :D:D been asked to apply for a 3 month sales position with one of the boutique breweries that Fosters owns - fun!! With a bit of luck there'd even be some beer incentives involved ;) Will definitely be good experience and maybe some extra money til I leave. My poor boss though, she looked a bit devastated when I said I'd be interested in the position... Anyone know of people with cars who are looking for easy merchandising work? Heh

For all youse pervy types

2007-02-19T23:24:25Z

Arguably Safe For Work

Busy Busy Weekend

2007-02-19T04:52:35Z

Friday night was good fun. Monkey and I semi-crashed msservalan and timling's cosy little date (only semi cos I think we were invited...). The new restaurant upstairs at Tamana's is very very nice with excellent food. Big plasma screens all around the room showing Bollywood movies, which meant that basically all we got out of Monkey all night was a few strange head and neck movements (I think he was trying to dance Bollywood styles) and "when I grow up I wanna be a Bollywood dancer!!". We decided he could be the world's most famous transgender Bollywood Dancer :)

Then up early Saturday morning to escort Monkey to a self defence class run by his Kung Fu teacher. It was informative but sadly most of the practical I couldn't really risk doing due to the amount of kicking, twisting and turning involved. I remain pretty confident however, that should the need arise, I could quite happily kick someone in the nuts if they got too close to me :)

Then a mad dash home with some nice soup, scoffed it, got ready for work, and a mad dash to work. It was a bit quiet and boring sadly, possibly due to Good Vibes being on, but I managed to convince lots of people to drink lots of beer - mission accomplished!

Up early *again* Sunday morning to scoot off to Victoria Park... Well, up sort of early... I might have slept in a bit :-* anyways, got to Fair Day just in time to start my volunteering in the first ever Mardi Gras Fair Day Volunteer Run Bar :D:D:D:D:D:D:D The day was full on, hectic, hot, exhausting etc but I think it's lucky I spent the majority of the day inside due to my propensity to burn. Was hoping to sneak off for ten minutes to see the Kung Fu demonstration but I had no chance :( Didn't really manage to bump into or catch up with many people but I was expecting that anyway.

Especially for Monkey

Meet me by the Hearts...

Snap!!!

How low can you go...

All serial like

And all suss like

And this one, just cos Shei looks so goddamn *hawt*

Edi** And my list of owies from the day:

Cuts in both hands from opening so many damn bottles of beer
Sunburnt face and neck (stoopid stoopid stoopid)
Blisters from the stoopid shoes I was wearing
And utter exhaustion leading to a 1pm sleep in - noooooooooice!! :D

Was very reassuring though, to know that I am actually capable of doing something that intense in terms of movement and being on feet for long-ish period of time. Probably couldn't do it often, but I survived it. And yes, codeine is my friend :)

Strange. Very very bizarre

2007-02-15T15:22:42Z

Had a really nice chat with Mum tonight. We seem to chat for an hour so every week or fortnight, usually depending on how often I remember to ring her.

So the chat's been going along nicely and we're just starting to wrap things up when... Completely out of left field Mum says
"Are you thinking of having children at any stage in the near future?"

Uhhhhhhhh... I'm stumped.

"Nooooooooo... I wasn't thinking of it", is all I can really muster. But poor Mum must be getting a little impatient:

"What about adopting? Why don't you try adopting?"

Hmmm... Maybe I need to get Mum some pamphlets on why they won't let gays adopt. And besides, my older brother's nearly 34 and married - HE should be popping out babies, not me!!

On the good news front however, I had pizza for dinner - YUM!! Haven't been able to have pizza since I cut gluten out of my diet over a month ago. This may not seem like a long time to go without pizza, but when you can't have something you think about it SOOOO much more :S So I found these strange little corn tortillas at the super market and used them as pizza bases. It was different, but good :) YAY!!

Oooh ooooh and... I got a new icon!! :D My favourite pic from Xmas at home (notice it has nothing to do with my deranged family :P) - me n my cute little baby boy Astrix

All systems are go!!

2007-02-10T05:40:42Z

Wow, actually posted away my EU passport application this morning!!
Thank you to everybody who offered advice on where to find a JP. Upon reading grushenkadoll's comment I re-examined the form and discovered that I had a list of a few professionals I could choose from, so a copper it was :D

Went to the ACON fundraiser last night. Was a pretty cool night actually... Had a shaky moment when I got there and realised my psycho ex was there but fortunately so was Nic the Butch *safe* - thanks to Nic for looking out for me :) was cool to hang out a bit with Pocket, Sam, Jack, Althea, Helen etc as well as spending increasingly important time with Chris & Shei.

Funniest moment of the night tho, had to go to a poor girl who I have seen do various performances at Gurlesque and the Slox. She got so excited trying to hit on me that she literally lost her balance and fell backwards!! Felt really bad when she came up to dance with me and I couldn't look at her or stop laughing! Juna :(

Anyways, LD tonight, reeeeeeeeeeeeeeally looking forward to it :)

Not too sure yet how to break it to Hubey & Freeq that I may have to withdraw myself from the jelly wrestling... :-*

And speaking of Monkey...

2007-02-09T01:07:02Z

This is the sort of grief I have to put up with from him:

And this beautiful text he sent me a few weeks ago:

"Shithouse poets, when they die,
There shall be erected in the sky,
A monument of their eternal wit,
A statue made from solid shit!"

I feel so special...

It's harassment I tells ya!

Typo?

2007-02-09T00:50:18Z

From this article on the death of Anna Nicole Smith, more specifically the link to a quote from Hugh Hefner:

In a statement released by Playboy's offices in Los Angeles, Hefner described Smith as a dead friend.

"I am very saddened to learn about Anna Nicole's passing," Hefner said in a statement. "She was a dear friend who meant a great deal to the Playboy family and to me personally."

**Edit: Monkey told me to post this here too